If y’all know me, you know I’ve struggled with my hair. Keeping it healthy, growing, thick… no problem.
The problem is with keeping a style I like, one that I’m comfortable with. One that is easy to do with my busy schedule. Doing my hair puts stress on my arms, hands and neck. I actually love doing my hair… well I used to. The thing is it takes me hours from start to finish.
It all started when I went completely natural. No chemicals. No Big Chop! (Truth is, My hair is my vanity) It’s been many years now, since 2013 that I started making my own hair products. I’ve gone through many styles, from Crochet styles, Sew ins, Braids, me doing afros (really drying for my hair), 2 strand or, 3 stands twists, even flat ironing for versatility. Until this year, after the last 9 months or so with a protective style, I decided to have an experts style my hair with just my hair, nothing added. Now that was a whole other issue, and I didnt like it at all. I like big hair and this wasn’t even close. Skinny, lifeless little strings all over my head. The stylist gave me just what I asked for though, but I pouted until I washed it with the twists still in place. Thats when a light bulb came on. Okay, now, I can work with this. I played in my hair, making new styles, it was fun until I had to take those skinny twists out. OMG! I realized for 1, I had a lot more hair, and 2, it was so much thicker than I had known. During the 9 months and prior, all I used on my hair was the products I made, flax seed and black soap shampoo, aloe conditioner, and daily I used my 11 Herbs and Oil Hair Oil Treatment. I went a few more times to have my own hair twisted until COVID-19 stopped that. That’s when I realized, I really appreciate my hair and with time it became much more manageable. I think, in my mind, I made it worse than it was. It was just a huge transition. So during all this I had a lot of emotions and frustrations trying to get used to not knowing what to do with my hair and how to style it. Mind you, everytime, I’d post on social media with my hair exposed, someone always told me how nice it looked; oh I like to new look.. it happened in person too. I’d take a double look in the mirror to see if I saw what they saw. I mentioned to a fellow friend and busuness owner the reason I didnt post much or do videos, was because I thought my hair needed to be just right. She quickly said it doesn’t matter about your hair, its all about message you’re putting out. Thats what people care about” Huh, that was awakening for me, never thought about that. (Vanity, I’ll admit it) She said it, I heard it, I actually posted, without concern for what my hair looked like and it felt pretty good too. But, of course I found another reason not to post my videos. Like one time you could see my underwear during a key part of the demo and another time my bra didn’t do its job. (Im not good at editing)
I said all of that to say, I think I’ve got it now, finally. Because today when I looked in the mirror and began what I thought would be a lengthy process turned out to be the revelation that Wow, I really like my hair. What I realized was this is really what natural is. Natural is not about the hair styles of other people, to me it’s about what your hair can do, Naturally! Before I went natural, my hair style was pretty much different everyday. I liked that, but I also knew what to do with my hair. I was comfortable with my look, and it was easy.
The transition to natural was not easy at all. My hair actually rebelled. It was dry, breaking and I just didn’t know what to do.
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