If y’all know me, you know I’ve struggled with my hair. But keeping it healthy, growing, thick… no problem.
The problem is with keeping a style I like, one that I’m comfortable with. One that is easy to do with my busy schedule. Doing my hair puts stress on my arms, hands and neck. I actually love doing my hair… well I used to. The thing is it takes me hours from start to finish.
It all started when I went completely natural. No more chemicals. No Big Chop! (Truth is, My hair is my vanity, my crown and glory)
It’s been many years now, since 2013, that I started making my own hair products. I’ve gone through many styles, from Crochet styles, Sew ins, Braids, me doing afros (really drying for my hair), 2 strand or, 3 stands twists, even flat ironing for versatility.
Until this year 2019, after the last 9 months or so with a protective style, I decided to have an expert style my hair with just my natural hair, no added hair. Now that was a whole other issue, and I didnt like it at all. I like big hair and this wasn’t even close. Skinny, lifeless little strings all over my head. The stylist gave me just what I asked for though, but I pouted until I washed it. I was not happy with the look. But when I washed my hair, I didn’t take the twists, i washed my head as though I had dreads. Thats when a light bulb came on.
Okay, now I can work with this. My hair was no longer skinny, it filled in those parts where you could see my scalp, and thicked a lot. I played in my hair, making new styles, it was fun…until I had to take those skinny twists out.
OMG! I realized for one, I had a lot more hair than I did 9 months ago and two, it was so much thicker than before.
During the 9 months and prior, all I used on my hair was the products I made, flax seed and black soap shampoo, aloe conditioner, and daily I used my 11 Herbs and Oil Hair Oil Treatment. I went a few more times to have my own hair twisted at the salon until COVID-19 stopped that. That’s when I realized, I really appreciate my hair and with time it became much more manageable.
I think, in my mind, I made it worse than it was. It was just a huge transition. So during all this I had a lot of emotions and frustrations trying to get used to not knowing what to do with my hair and how to style it. Mind you, everytime, I’d post on social media with my hair exposed, someone always told me how nice it looked; oh they like to new look.. it happened in person too. I’d take a double look in the mirror to see if I saw what they saw. I mentioned to a friend and fellow business owner the reason I didnt post much or do videos was because I thought my hair needed to be just right. She quickly said it doesn’t matter about your hair, its all about message you’re putting out. Thats what people care about” Huh, that was awakening for me, never thought about that. (Vanity, I’ll admit it was always holding me back) She said it, I heard it, I actually posted that night without concern for what my hair looked like and it felt pretty good too. But, of course I found another reason not to post my videos. Like one time you could see my underwear during a key part of my demo and another time my bra didn’t do its job. (I’m not good at editing)
I said all of that to say, I think I’ve got it now, finally. Because today when I looked in the mirror and began what I thought would be a lengthy process turned out to be the revelation that Wow, I really like my hair. What I realized was this is really what natural is.
Natural is not about the hair styles of other people, now I know it’s about what your hair can do itself, Naturally!
Before I went natural, my hair style was pretty much different everyday. I liked that, but I also knew what to do with my hair. I was comfortable with my look, and it was easy and I was good at it. I have always been able to do my own hair since my youth.
The transition to natural was not easy at all. My hair actually rebelled. It was dry, breaking and I just didn’t know what to do.
Just thought I’d share my hair journey. Check out some photos. Don’t laugh too hard